Lol jokes
Boy: Dad I want an Apple or a Blackberry!
Dad: Well it's the mango season! Go eat mangoes! :p
*********************
Daughter : I am in love with the neighbor, so I am running away with him.
Dad: Thanks , you have saved my money & time.
Daughter: Dad, I am reading the letter left by Mom!
BEAUTIFUL FAMILY
************************
If you don't want your loved one smoking,
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
then better find a way to make their lips busy :'>
*************************
Some Guys hold their Girlfriend’s
hand in Malls
Bcoz
If they leave her hand.. She’ll go
shopping,
It looks ROMANTIC but actually its
ECONOMIC.
*************************
Proud to Be an Indian ... ;-)
Once in a soap industry in Japan,
the soap cover was mistakenly packed without soap in it which resulted in empty box.
To avoid the problem in future they purchased X-Ray machine of 60 thousand dollars to check whether soap is Packed in cover or not in
assembly line.
Same problem occurred in India
What they did?
They simply put a pedestal fan beside assembly line.
Empty boxes were flown away!
******************************
Algorithm followed by Majority of Girls on Facebook:
1. Upload a new profile pic...
2. Wait for everyone & I mean almost EVERYONE to like and/or comment "cute", "cho...chweeet", "awwww", "awesome" etc...
3. Be happy...
4. Respond to every comment & like INDIVIDUALLY with “Thank you sweetie… you
are so sweet” so that the number of comments rises exponentially...
5. Be happy again!!!
6. Go to step 1
**********************************
If Titanic was made in India
1) There would be 10 times as many people on the ship
2) There would be a song with Kate Winslet in a white saree and of course singing in the rain
3) The movie would be called "Pyar Kiya To Marna Kya"
4) Hero and Heroine would float in cold water for days and still survive, but the villian would die on the first dip
5) The iceberg would be sent by the heroine's father to teach the hero a lesson
6) None of the women would float due to heavy designer sarees.
And last but not least
7) Half of the rescue boats would be reserved for SC/ST/OBC
*********************************
A Teenage Girl was chatting on FB with a stranger
.
.
.
Stranger: hey pretty! Could you give me your mail id?
.
.
Gal: oh yes sure :)
its --> ihaveaboyfriend_andilovehimalot@getlost.com
.
.
.
.
Stranger: and mine is --> iamyourfather_andyouaredead@meetmenow.com :
*****************************
A salesman hugs a girl..
Girl: What the hell is this?
Salesman: It is direct marketing..
Girl slaps him..
Salesman: What is this?
Girl: It is a customer's feedback!
**************************
Kid: What is husband and wife?
Granny: Husband is the head of the family but wife is the neck,
which can turn head anywhere!
**************************
Dear Computer user,
I have one complain... you press all the keys so softly.. then why the hell you hit me with all power...:(
Sincerely,
Bechari "Enter Key" :D
Dad: Well it's the mango season! Go eat mangoes! :p
*********************
Daughter : I am in love with the neighbor, so I am running away with him.
Dad: Thanks , you have saved my money & time.
Daughter: Dad, I am reading the letter left by Mom!
BEAUTIFUL FAMILY
************************
If you don't want your loved one smoking,
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
then better find a way to make their lips busy :'>
*************************
Some Guys hold their Girlfriend’s
hand in Malls
Bcoz
If they leave her hand.. She’ll go
shopping,
It looks ROMANTIC but actually its
ECONOMIC.
*************************
Proud to Be an Indian ... ;-)
Once in a soap industry in Japan,
the soap cover was mistakenly packed without soap in it which resulted in empty box.
To avoid the problem in future they purchased X-Ray machine of 60 thousand dollars to check whether soap is Packed in cover or not in
assembly line.
Same problem occurred in India
What they did?
They simply put a pedestal fan beside assembly line.
Empty boxes were flown away!
******************************
Algorithm followed by Majority of Girls on Facebook:
1. Upload a new profile pic...
2. Wait for everyone & I mean almost EVERYONE to like and/or comment "cute", "cho...chweeet", "awwww", "awesome" etc...
3. Be happy...
4. Respond to every comment & like INDIVIDUALLY with “Thank you sweetie… you
are so sweet” so that the number of comments rises exponentially...
5. Be happy again!!!
6. Go to step 1
**********************************
If Titanic was made in India
1) There would be 10 times as many people on the ship
2) There would be a song with Kate Winslet in a white saree and of course singing in the rain
3) The movie would be called "Pyar Kiya To Marna Kya"
4) Hero and Heroine would float in cold water for days and still survive, but the villian would die on the first dip
5) The iceberg would be sent by the heroine's father to teach the hero a lesson
6) None of the women would float due to heavy designer sarees.
And last but not least
7) Half of the rescue boats would be reserved for SC/ST/OBC
*********************************
A Teenage Girl was chatting on FB with a stranger
.
.
.
Stranger: hey pretty! Could you give me your mail id?
.
.
Gal: oh yes sure :)
its --> ihaveaboyfriend_andilovehimalot@getlost.com
.
.
.
.
Stranger: and mine is --> iamyourfather_andyouaredead@meetmenow.com :
*****************************
A salesman hugs a girl..
Girl: What the hell is this?
Salesman: It is direct marketing..
Girl slaps him..
Salesman: What is this?
Girl: It is a customer's feedback!
**************************
Kid: What is husband and wife?
Granny: Husband is the head of the family but wife is the neck,
which can turn head anywhere!
**************************
Dear Computer user,
I have one complain... you press all the keys so softly.. then why the hell you hit me with all power...:(
Sincerely,
Bechari "Enter Key" :D
0 comments: